Sometimes I think what is life in general just a bunch of webs of
relationships heart ache and trust and lies. I am not just talking about
sexual relationships my reader I am talking about friendships as well.
You may be thinking ok, how is she thinking up all this stuff? Well it
came to me one night as I stood on the dance floor in my favorite club
that we are all either lust driven, emotionally driven or trying to fill
the void of our childhood left in us.
Ok you are thinking right about now I am guessing what the
hell is this stuff I want a romance or sex story ok chill you will get it
just let me explain. So I was watching my girl friend dance watching her
body thinking she was so hot. Then thinking its funny how we changed just
a year ago I was dating my ex boy friend whom I was going to marry.
However, I am so glad I didn't for the simple fact I have has a lot of
sexual experience too.
One day I was rubbing my legs down with bengay they hurt from
motorcycling and having eight hours of sex the night before. We did
everything from strapon sex to double dildo to fingering everything in
every room. Then I had an inch on my so I took the hand with the bengay
not thinking and inch my inch it touched my clit and burned. My girl
friend being daring did the same and then we rubbed each others clits
until we got off.
She even went down on me and flicked mine wondering how it
teased. I was like oh my god what did I do? Well I learned one thing it
was amazing just amaze my clit was so sanative I came so hard I wanted to
scream. Anyway a word of advice don't put your mouth down there my girl
friend couldn't get her mouth to stop burning for four hours.
Then next week, my best friend tells me she tried scope dam
that was a little better she said her mouth was mint when she ate her ex
out. She told me how her girl friends clit had rose to a aroused little
nub and how she would suck it in with her mouth gently gliding it over
her teeth. She loved it she said they both were in heaven.
Well maybe sex can bring us all together cause for the next
few months that is all we joked about. I think on this as I walk slowly
over to my girl friend on the dance floor she was wearing a red dress
shirt and jeans. I started to dance with her and the music was all around
me I got lost in it and forgot about my thoughts can't get you out of my
head came on and I danced to it.
Well later that night I went home and started to floor around
stripped on web cam while men watched and I laughed thinking then can
never have me cause I will never sleep with another man. Just as I said
that and was ready to go to bed a friend of mind called me in pain her
boy friend had just dumped her. Just the week before she had told me how
they were in love and have great sex every day and she loved doggie and
the feel of his dick going in and out of her. God yuck. I am thinking as
I turn on the radio and scan the songs love songs how taken over the
world. I ran into the other room and turned on the computer to more
dating sites I gave.
We decided it would be best for us to play a board game and
talk to get away from love. She was really depressed. So we sat there and
talked. Now I had always liked her but she was straight so I never went
there. Suddenly she started kissing me and ripping my clothes off and she
started to flick my clit and suck it so hard and fast needing to do this
compelled to do this. Now the whole time I was think oh shit my girl
friend she is going to kill me.
Then I slid her on her back and I sucked and fingered her
fast so she came quickly so I could get home to my girl friend and forget
this ever happy and pray she never found out. Well she never did because
I realized I wasn't happy and I left her for my best friend. Three weeks
Wow it never ends does it so my long search for what ever I am
searching for has to continue through the long blackness of night. Some
nights I sit up in part of my research on sex and talk to people in the
Yahoo chat rooms. It any whir is bursting with cyber and cam sex its Yahoo.
I guess some people are alone or rejected and need sexual release and that
is there form sadly.
Is it lust that keeps us moving on or is it something greater
love maybe or the human instinted to have a life partner to mate and have
kids and create a since of security. I remember one time I was online on
Yahoo caming with this woman she wouldn't stop IMing me acting like we
were dating when we weren't I was like go away and wanting me to show my
self on cam nude. I really don't see the point it pushing your self to
do something for some one else that is agents your morals.
Morals are a funny thing they can make you or break you one
min you can say you will never do something then in your next breath you
will do it like a little girl saying she won't have candy but then she
has it. Or some one that says I will go on a diet then doesn't. Then
main question is why do we do this to each other and more importantly to
our selves? I ask my self this every time I refuse some one something now
don't know why just do.
The bigger question is why do we hurt the ones we love through
break ups. I think our society loves learning through pain look at boxing
and wwe for example. Piano mixed with sexy women to make it all look good
sadly. Just a few thoughts on sex for you to think about in general thought
I would write out my thoughts for you my dear reader to read.